CBT

CBT

1.      Introduction

Initially, CBT is a relatively new approach that heals the human being through a deep-level healing process. It focuses on human thoughts, then feelings that do finally change the behavior of the human. It was originally created recently, and positively changed many individuals.

 

Also, we are going to discuss various thinking errors that are so harmful to our minds, and kill creativity, flying, thinking freely and so on.

 

2.      History of CBT

CBT is a merged approach that comes out as a result of an integration of two approaches cognitive therapy and behavioral therapy.

 

Behavioral therapy has been founded as an approach to help in changing in human outputs, it had its beginnings in the early 20^th century, by psychologists Ivan Pavlov, John B. Watson, and B.F. Skinner, it mainly focuses to change the outer behaviors, by observing behaviors and changing it, through techniques like enforcement and conditioning.

 

Cognitive therapy, on the other hand, was developed by Aaron Beck, in the 1960s. He noticed his patients suffer from depression, by deep negative thoughts, he started to focus on changing their thoughts. Then, he has got his approach by observing their thoughts patterns and changing it by continual and persistent sessions.

 

As a result of combining these two approaches, they have got their new approach CBT, the sequence of a thought that leads to a specific feeling, that finally leads to a behavior that is either good or bad.

 

3.      Cognitive distortions

Through CBT, we are necessarily exposed to some thinking errors or mistakes that don’t help create proper action (wrong though finally leads to a wrong behavior). Check if you are a citizen of one of these dominant kingdoms:

1.      All-or-nothing thinking:

Starting with this black-or-white thinking error that can destruct person’s achievements, if you think that you have done nothing, once you missed a task, a paper, or a mark (in an exam).

 

Do you think this is a proper thinking way? Let’s look at it from a different perspective. When you achieve 80%, so you have got 80 out of 100, when you have finished all your tasks except a small task, so you have finished all your tasks except a small task.

 

It’s logical to affirm that no one can always be perfect, even if it seems to be always perfect, it’s also logical to say that there is nothing called “nothing” once you have spent some effort.

 

2.      Overgeneralization:

Overgeneralization is the best way to know the future, but actually, no one knows the future. As an example, if someone had been late for their meetings several times, does this typically mean he will come late for all future meetings?!!

Of course, it’s not a logical thinking way, may that person start a daily routine that can help him come on his time?! Do you know the exact reason why he was late?! May that reason be gone!!

 

When you see a situation, judge the situation only, you cannot predict typically any coming situation.

 

For example, don’t say “all Egyptians are clever” or “schools are bad organizations”, instead say “this person, individually, is not a good person.” or “my day was bad”.

 

3.      Mental filter:

Looking at a situation and ignoring the good aspects of it, you just ignore it subconsciously, you focus only on the negative side, while there is a clear positive side that you can’t see it.

 

To redirect your thoughts, start your journey by awareness. Be aware of your thoughts’ patterns, monitor where your thoughts lead you, it will lighten up your way for a more balanced thinking style. Then, start to challenge your thoughts to contain the full picture both negative and positive sides. In this point, you can ask yourself to relook at it from a different perspective, as someone else looks at it.

 

Then, start to balance your thoughts to contain the bad and good aspects, force yourself to see the good in every situation, there is always a light in every darkness.

 

Also, other explanations can be considered instead of negative conclusions, so that other ones can conclude other aspects, which can be the truth.

 

4.      Discounting positives:

Seeing every positive quality or strength point to be caused by external factors, not by internal efforts, for example, to count a specific achievement to be by luck, not your efforts, although it would never happen except by your consistent work. This is a well-known cognitive distortion that has to be avoided, and to be aware of it. It may lead to feelings of low self-esteem and negative self-image, or maybe a result of a low self-esteem and negative self-image.

 

To challenge those thoughts, start as usual to be aware of having this cognitive distortion, and then start to control and challenge your internal thoughts to be directed toward a sensible and balanced thinking style, having the situation from almost every perspective, to be thinking in a sound way.

 

To get an example, imagine a boy who has got high grades in school, he has just got his semester results, he had high grades, and his family were happy, but he sat down on the floor and said, “I’m not worthy to get those high grades, it was my parents’ efforts to teach me well”, and he was crying!!

Would you think this boy has a sound personality?! I don’t think he is.

 

5.      Jumping to conclusions:

Simply, it means to have a conclusion very fast, so that you don’t see the full picture, as you get to the conclusion, on a fast-paced basis and without real evidence, you don’t have evidence to judge, but you judge!!

 

As an example, you had a situation where you were treated as if you had made a huge mistake, and you concluded the situation – with no evidence – that you are a bad person due to that mistake (that you have realized you had made!!). After the situation passed, someone told you, they were so upset as if someone had made a mistake, and it made them all as accused.

 

So, let’s reframe what has happened! They were all upset, they treated you differently, you concluded the situation by saying: “I’m a bad person”, but excuse me, you concluded it in a wrong way, you are not as you think you are.

Think clearly, think deeply, mention your why for your conclusion. Ask yourself the same question, from another point of view (from another perspective), look at it again, have you judged properly?!

 

6.      Magnification and minimization:

When you magnify the negative aspects, and minimize the positive ones, as an example, at work, you have been exposed to criticism after multiple praises from different individuals, but you ignore all positive point, and focus deeply on the only one negative point, this is called exaggerating.

 

The first step to get rid of that cognitive distortion is to be aware of that distortion, notice the exaggeration of your mind, and minimization (neglecting) the positive ones. Then, challenge these thoughts, confront them with courage, find another perspective to look at the situation from.

You can go out of you, and think again, was I right? Was that the proper size of the problem or that was an exaggeration?! Did I neglect something positive and focused only on negative ones?!

 

Mostly, most cases we may be prone to discount positive aspects of the situation (due to our brain preference to be safe all the time). Think consciously about problems’ sizes to not exaggerate nor minimize.

 

7.      Emotional reasoning:

Simply, it’s a judgement you make because of a feeling, which is not logical!!

For instance, if you are going to an exam tomorrow, but you feel you did not study well, it doesn’t necessarily mean you didn’t study well, and you say, “I will do bad on tomorrow’s exam.”, so you concluded a situation based on your feeling, not a fact.

 

Avoid this, by rational thinking, ask yourself, is this a fact? Am I making judgements based on feelings not facts??

You will realize the truth about your judgment, you, also, can ask yourself, do I have evidence?

 

You can judge by your thoughts (by facts), not by “I feel like bla bla bla”, for example, when you have done your work, and your boss tells you have done great job, distinguish between them:

·         you feel you haven’t finished it well (feeling).

·         Do I have evidence I did bad?? (rational thinking)

 

It can also help, when you are experiencing negative emotions, like:

·         “I am a bad person.”, ask yourself why?

·         “I am a worthless person.”, ask yourself why?

·         “No one loves me.”, ask yourself about the evidence.

·         I’m a failure.”, ask yourself why?

 

8.      Should statements:

“I should write this article perfectly.”, it’s a typical should statement, that’s not supposed to be. It generates negative feelings, due to the false duty, I’ve committed myself to do. In this case, I may find an article talking about CBT, has a point, not mentioned here, but originally, it wasn’t a must, or an obligation to finish this article perfectly, that was a self-imposed rule.

 

To explain it through examples, here they are:

·         “I should always be perfect in my work.”

·         “I should always understand others’ emotions.”

·         “I must be right all the time.” Or “I must never make any mistake.”

·         “I should be kind all the time to all people.”

·         “I should do this now.” (As a tradition, it’s not a must.)

 

Should statements cognitive distortion cause internal frustrations, that it commits oneself to do things he shouldn’t have been committed about. Should statements, on oneself, can lead to self-criticism, guilt and other negative feelings, which are generated due to a wrong self-imposed rule.

 

Once you notice many should statements in your head, think once again, is this a real obligation? Should I do this? Is this a self-imposed rule? Or should I really do this?

 

9.      Labelling:

Applying labels to oneself or others, for example, you’ve made a wrong decision, you apply this label to yourself “I can’t take decisions.”, although you may have made many proper decisions, but you applied that label based on only one situation.

 

These labels may be “idiot”, “stupid”, “loser”, “failure”, etc. but it doesn’t worth these labels, based on a single event, labelling is a very harmful cognitive distortion to oneself and others. For example, labelling may lead to low self-esteem, although it’s not true, it’s not real you are “loser”, “failure” or whatever based on a single event.

 

To avoid it, firstly, be aware of that, notice you are applying labels to either yourself or others. For example, someone made a mistake or take a wrong decision, would you assume “he is a failure.”? The same applies to yourself, for example, you arrived late once, would you apply label to you “I’m careless.”? Notice that carefully.

 

Secondly, challenge that cognitive distortion, ask yourself, why making one mistake determines my identity? Is that sensible? Is that true that making a single mistake – or even a series of mistakes – means “I’m a failure.”? Also, think critically, think of the same situation from another perspective, what were the circumstances that led to that attitude? You arrived late, but streets were crowded, did you consider that? You made a wrong decision, but your emotions were not stable due to your mother who is tired, so you couldn’t think clearly, have you considered that? Someone cancelled a planned trip, but he had an emergency, had you considered that? Think critically of the same situation.

 

Think in a balanced way, instead of those negative thoughts, you can achieve this by creating balanced environment (in your head, as mentioned in “discount positives”). Always remember, we are what we say to ourselves, they are self-fulfilling prophecies, be careful, we are not labelled.

 

4.      Cognitive model

The cognitive model is the base of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), it shows the relations among thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Situations or events themselves are not responsible for the behaviors, the way we see the situations is responsible for it. Feelings are generated by thoughts; by altering these thoughts, we can change our feelings, and thus we change our behaviors. A negative thought can lead to a negative feeling, and thus to an undesired behavior.

 

To illustrate the basic concept, our thoughts are the driver of our emotions and behaviors, it determines what we feel and what we do, as a response to a situation. Thoughts can individually control the whole human, and turn their mind upside down, and thus their behavior. For example, if someone made a mistake in their job, they have two options, either to say, “I feel sad, I’m failure, I have to leave work there.”, or say, “That’s okay, I will concentrate next times, and mistakes do not identify who I am.”, we need to shift our thinking patterns to match the second person.

 

Automatic thoughts are automatically generated in our subconscious minds, often shaped by our childhood experiences. These thoughts can significantly impact our mood, which then affects our emotion and behaviors.

Usually, we are not aware of those automatic thoughts as they occur so quickly, for example, a boy, in his school, entered his classroom, everyone is laughing. Once he walks in, they stop. He might think, “They don’t consider me one of them.”. This can upset him, however there is no evidence that supports his thought.

 

Core beliefs, deep-rooted ideas, are ideas that form during childhood, these beliefs are about ourselves, others, or the world around us. They determine the way we act in various situations, our emotions, and our automatic thoughts as well. These core beliefs are often buried, and not as clear as surface-level thoughts. Through these beliefs, we perceive the world. For instance, if someone thinks “I’m a failure.”, they tend to view the world through the lens of that belief, concluding that they are a failure.

For example, if a child receives love and appreciation, they develop a core belief they are valued and worthy. Conversely, a child receives criticism may develop a core belief that they are inadequate.

To be continued…